The Edge Of Hell: Aka Rock ‘N’ Roll Nightmare
Jon Mikl Thor does not give one solitary shit. It’s not a surprise as he’s massive. Action figure type massive.
Yet he somehow still looks like a woman your mother used to work with. Anyway, I digress. So big Thor (as John Triton, yeah, I know) and his band mates decide to record their new album in a farmhouse kitted out with a new 24-track recording studio. If this wasn’t unusual enough, it’s THE VERY SAME farmhouse in which a family mysteriously disappeared.
Wanna see what the band look like? Of course you do, BEHOLD! 12 Mermaids died for that jacket.
Obviously Jon and his buddies have a god awful time of things (think of standing on Lego and an upturned plug simultaneously), and quite unluckily end up dying in ridiculous ways. One gets killed by a cigarette smoking hand puppet. Honestly.
As it luckily turns out though, Triton is having none of this. Only the ACTUAL bloody Satan turns up! In a farmhouse in America! Saying that I once saw an episode of My Ghost Story where a fat woman said she had an EVP (Electronic Voice Phenomena…I know my shit) recording of a voice saying her son’s name. “Clear as a bell” she said, “Clear as a bell, you can hear him say Brandon”. What it actually sounded like was “VVBBBVVVVVBBTTTZZ”. Silly cow.
Anyway, John Triton makes short work of the piss poor looking Satan and saves the day. Huzzah! I realise I’ve made it sound extremely short. It may as well be. On the upside though, Thor sings the mother of all cheese 80s rock tunes for the soundtrack.
Click that bad boy above and let ‘We Live To Rock’ seep into your system
Ahhhh….I wish I was Jon Mikl Thor
Doginawaistcoat.com 
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